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Everything I need to know I learned from Noah's Ark

1. Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.

2. Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone might ask you to do something big.

3. Don't listen to critics. Do what has to be done.

4. Build on high ground!

5. For safety's sake, travel in pairs.

6. Two heads are better than one.

7. Speed isn't always the advantage. The cheetahs were on board, but so were the snails.

8. If you can't fight or flee - float!

9. Take care of your animals as if they were the last ones on earth.

10. Don't forget that were all in the same boat.

11. When the doo doo gets really deep, don't sit there and complain - shovel!

12. Stay below deck during the storm.

13. Remember that the ark was built by amateurs and the Titanic was built by professionals.

14. Remember that the woodpeckers INSIDE are often a bigger threat than the storm outside.

15. Don't miss the boat.

16. No matter how bleak it looks, there's always a rainbow on the other side.